A dream about a bearMy dad was in my dream last night. A good portion of said dream consisted of him shooting a bear and making a rug out of it. I wake up this morning, and there is an article in the paper about shooting bears to limit the population. Interesting. If you knew my father, you would know why this is ridiculous...although I am sure you still get the coincidence of it all. After all, you are not an idiot. Here are some of the grad schools I will be applying to:Marywood University (doctorate)The George Washington University (doctorate or masters)Rutgers University-New Brunswick (doctorate)Widener University (doctorate)La Salle University (doctorate-safety school, I'm an alumnus!)SUNY Albany (doctorate)Northeastern University (masters)Marist College (masters-safety school)Pace University (masters)and still looking....If you know anything about these programs in clinical psy, please let me know!

Emode.comI'm surprised how valid these tests are.Erin, your emotions are triggered by your underlying belief in Integrity In other words, your uncompromisingly honest nature directly affects how, and how often, you experience certain feelings.For example, your test results indicate that you're most fulfilled when you hold fast to your moral ideals. That factor is directly related to your fundamental belief in integrity and the range of emotions it triggers.

Now I feel all warm and fuzzyErin, your best quality shines through in how Compassionate you are The fact that you're a caring and considerate person who is typically very loving, as well really draws people to you! But that's not the only thing. Your answers on the test indicate you're a funny person who is likely known for your great sense of humor. You are a calm, relaxed person who tends to take life in stride, too.In all, there are 15 qualities that help define you when you're at your best. Those are the traits potential employers, friends, and partners look for in you. What makes you unique is your particular distribution of those 15 qualities.We've found that your particular combination of qualities is rare -- only 3 in 10,000 people share the same general mix of traits. Those are great odds if you're trying to show a potential employer, colleague, friend, or date why you're exactly the right person for them.

Your score is: 4 - 7: Nudist potential!You definitely have it in you right now to become a nudist. Just remember to breath deeply and seize the penultimate moment with both hands and no clothes. You'll probably need to read the Slightly Longer Way to Becoming a Nudist suggestions.The Average score for this test is 9.36. I'm frightened.

More boring than my lifeI learned something today. I learned this little tidbit watching tv. What did I learn? This is what I learned:There is a man that is currently living in Charles de Gaulle Airport in Paris and has been for 14 years. He can't leave the airport and enter France, and he can't go anywhere else. So he lives there. Suddenly, my life does not seem so bad. Now, the guy has a stable home, clean bathrooms, plenty of horrible food to ingest... and while the French are not necessarily known for their hygiene... this situation raises the question of how the guy keep anything from.. well, molding over. ANYWHO-For lack of something interesting to write, I will rattle off my current reading list. =)1- A Tree Grows in Brooklyn2- Take the Cannoli3- The Cement Garden4- First Love, Last Rites5- The Diary of an American Au Pair6- Trauma and Recovery7- Motivational Interviewing8- Essentials of Chemical Dependency Counseling9- Therapeutic Communication10- Talk is Not Enough 11- Ethics for Addiction Professionals12- Helping Survivors of Incest (or something like that)I need to get out more.

It's been a week since I wrote on here?

I better keep on top of this journal, lest the masses fall victim to the assertion that I may, in fact, have a life!! I wanted to fit the word "Hark" in there, but I'm not having much luck, hehe. This was a challenging week. Monday is as Mondays always are. Tuesday ended earlier, but I felt like garbage and Val (now officially my boss... I think) took over the COA group for me. Those kids are soooooooo cute, but they soooooooooo didn't help my migraine! ;) Wednesday was hump day but I didn't get much action, HAAAAAHAHA! Ok, I know I am the only one laughing, but don't rain on my parade, dag nabbit!! Thursday was really cool. Group went very well at night and it was productive. Furthermore, Jean called me, which was a nice surprise. The voice didn't ring a bell at first, but then it sounded familiar. I can't believe it's been ten years. I feel that it may be similar to burying and then digging up a time capsule years later. Afterall, our memories of each other are static and can't possibly come close to explaining who were are now. On the other hand, we may have come to know the essence of the other individual and saw the beginning of the blossoming during those formative years. It's an interesting thought at any rate. Due to boredom, I now present:100 Little Known Facts About ME1. I know how much wood a woodchuck would chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.2. I was once asked to be in a music video while waiting for someone in Manhattan3. I once shared a bucket, yes BUCKET, of alcohol with 5 other people. 4. I once leaped out of a booth and did a conga line with a guy in Lederhosen.5. Facts #3 and #4 are related6. While in Germany, I stayed in some guys living room that I didn't know. It's ok though, the 3 people I went with didn't know him either and it all worked out smashingly! 7. Ronald McDonald scares me for many, many reasons8. I have been known to sit on the floor of a crowded McDonalds, cross my legs, and do my very loud, very obnoxious Yanni impression. 9. There is absolutely no relation between #7 and #8... although I would probably respect the guy if he could, or would, do anything as embarrassing!10. I am a leather whore. Notice I did not say a "whore IN leather" or a "leathered whore", but a "leather whore." 11. I am addicted to Sprite.12. I was supposed to be born on Groundhog Day, but I arrived fashionably late two days later. =)13. I broke my own arm when I was 2 years old by purposely escaping from my playpen. 14. I love the muppets.15. I currently have a picture in the semi-finals of the International Library of Photography contest. Grand Prize is $10,000!! Cross your fingers!!!!16. I used to be on the Sixflags Great Adventure promotional video that shows in the parks while you are waiting online. I have a HUGE Taz in my hands/in front of me and I did a little dance with him while in front of the main fountain. Look for me, it's fast!!17. I hate Alanis Morisette, Peter Gabriel, and Bob Saggat. I would kill them all if I did not find homicide morally reprehensible.18. I love kids but fear childbirth.19. I like the idea of owning a parrot that can talk. 20. I rock at badminton... so bring it on!!21. I am an assistant instructor in tae kwon do, although it has been a while since I have trained.22. I seem to be immune to Poison Ivy.23. I have studied Spanish, Italian, Sign Language, and I know some choice phrases in German and French. 24. I have been to two Papal Masses. One in New York City, one in Vatican City in La Piazza di San Pietro. 25. I lived in Rome for 4 months and i musei vaticani was my metro stop (the vatican museum stop). 26. No matter where I am, I am often sought out for information by complete strangers. 27. I was once told that I just look like I know things. Maybe this explains #26. 28. The best compliment I was ever given consisted of two words- "NICE BRAIN!!!" by my neurologist taking a gander at my MRI scan29. I once found an empty liquor bottle and a tampon applicator and NOTHING else of the roof of a university residence. The tar of the roof had gravel all over.. it couldn't have been comfortable, which only adds to the mystery...30. I used to have reeeeeeeeally curly hair and now it's nothin' but straight!31. People have thought that I was sober while I was completely drunk and have also thought I was bombed when I was completely sober!!32. I really want to be on CBS's THE AMAZING RACE!!33. I am only photogenic on roller coasters or when I'm a wee bit tipsy and am really cheesing for the camera =)34. I think opossums are terrible cute... if they all had no tails. 35. I feel bad killing cocroaches, ants, flies, mice, and even family members. 36. I have a very strong conscience, see #35.37. My middle name is Elizabeth and my Confirmation name is Theresa, the little flower. 38. I once worked a parking lot booth in Chesnut Hill/Philadelphia when I had no damn idea what I was doing. It was very amusing. The guy that was working at it was helping my friend with her car, so I lived it up in the booth. Trust me when I say that this was HIGHLY amusing, although I guess simply saying that does not do the situation justice. 39. My breasts were named while I was out socializing one night. My left is now affectionately known as "Liza" and my right as "Bette"... I had no say in this matter. 40. I want to learn how to play the drums.41. I once had a dream that came true- 100%42. I have met Sugar Ray and A Simple Plan. I put away Sugar Ray's drum kit and told the lead guy in A Simple Plan to tell his driver "THANK YOU!!" for not hitting my car. He was no more than 5 inches away from crushing my car to smithereens. 43. I once could sing. I swear. 44. When I was younger, I sat down at my grandmother's organ and played here comes the bride straight through. More than once. 45. I love writing and have a couple ideas for manuscripts in the works. 46. My favorite author is David Sederis. He writes in a comedic style that I often think in, sometimes act in. If I could be a Macy's elf, I would. No doubt. 47. I have a cat named Cupcake and I used to have a hamster named Marshmallow. So sue me, I like junk food. 48. I laughed for about 20 mins when, upon my return from Italy, I was promptly informed by my favorite ghetto fabulous Diva, Anne, that Puff Daddy was now known as P. Diddy. 49. I own the documentary "9/11" and watch it periodically when I feel like I'm taking things for granted. It focuses me like nothing else can. 50. The greatest discomfort I have ever endured was a result of 40 onion rings, plenty of time to digest them, and a loooooooooong car ride. Bad memories.51. My favorite character on The Simpsons is Groundskeeper Willie. 52. My future husband MUST have an unbelievable sense of humor.53. I have 12 stiches in my noggin.. 6 above my right eye, 6 in my chin. Basically I ran forehead first into a sharp wooden balister and passed out at 4th grade graduation practice, respectively. =/54. I've never claimed that I am not clumsy or overzealous in some of my pursuits. See #53.55. I'm pretty sure my best friend saved me from being eaten by this truly whacked out individual on the NYC subway going towards Brooklyn. 56. I'm surprised that I have come up with as many of these as I have. 57. I've only been to one Yankee game =(58. My aunt was missing for a while and was supposed to be in the business district the day the Twin Towers fell. She decided last minute to go to church...59. I still cannot believe 9/11 happened the way it did and I'm certainly still not "over" it.60. Some budding tv channel called "Joke TV" wanted me to entertain them on camera in Philadelphia. Joke TV? That's not even original!!61. Sunlight makes me sneeze and itch. 62. I used to play She-rah (sp?) with my father when I was younger and my mom and brother went to church. My father had a rolled up newspaper, I had a sword. I whupp'd him, but he's still a little upset about it, so don't mention it.63. Florescent light gives me pimples. Eww. 64. I once downed "suicidal" hot chicken wings at Down the Hatch without a drink. My throat still burned the next day. I don't even like chicken wings. 65. I do like chicken soup now, though. =)66. The only time I had a nice tan going was while I lived in the Mediterranean. In the US I'm right next to Albino. 67. I love watching people.68. I have seen a woman made comprised solely of soap and a 13 foot colon. My life is now complete. 69. My nicknames in college were: Turboslut, RAH!, Er ("air"), Boom Boom, and one more I recalled when I originally began writing this sentence but have since forgoten.. shoot!70. I've danced on tables to polka music while toasting my litre of beer to 4,000 random strangers.71. I once seriously entertained the thought of becoming a nun. 72. I dressed as a Troll for my aunt once and I got verbal abuse from adults and from some children that asked if I was a treasure troll and then poked me in the stomach. Little cretins!! 73. I still have anxiety provoking flashbacks of the incident listed above. ;)74. I was called "enigmatic" by the dean of my undergraduate university once. Needless to say, I wasn't sure how to take it!75. If I died tomorrow, I would want to go in a heroic fashion. 76. I loathe hating someone and am generally quick to forgive and slow to irritate. I can think of only one major exception.77. La Vita è Bella is my favorite movie. 78. There is absolutely nothing on this earth I would enjoy doing more than sitting and having a good conversation with a friend. Second would be laughing. 79. The only member of my family that I missed while I was in college was my kittery cat. =) 80. My favorite smells are coffee, donuts, and gas (petrol!!)81. I hate mornings and am a chronically late person. (that's well known, but hey, I'm running low here)82. "Peaches", the song by the Presidents of the United States of America is the song that is most likely to stick in my head. AAGH!83. I have begun a photo collection of prostitutes. I enjoy this hobby immensely. >=)84. My mind constantly ponders the inane. I've already figured out the meaning of life, so I have to keep busy somehow, right?85. I have a drunken talent of knowing exactly how many drinks each of my friends has had. 86. I am quite self confident about many things. However, I am also self-conscious about certain things. In many ways, I am a walking contradiction, the embodiment of a catch 22, if you will. 87. I haven't met a person I can't make laugh.88. I once electrocuted myself accidentally... whoopsie! 89. I have never laughed harder in my life than at a training in Albany in April when this guy next to me came up with a name for a female American Indian client- "Judy Arrowhead" Oh MAN!! HAH! I literally could not stop laughing. 90. The only candybar I can constantly remember the name of is the "Whatchamacallit"91. People routinely tell me that I should be either a comedian or a cop. 92. Nothing makes me madder faster than injustice.93. I've broken all the "pinky" bones in my body (there's 4 in case you are lost).94. My arms, I believe, are double jointed. Well, maybe I'm just deformed. Either way, my arms even out past 180 degrees. 95. I have a high tolerance for pain if someone else has inflicted it upon me. Shovel to the face? Shocking, but surprisingly, not painful.96. If I injure myself, the pain is excruciating.97. I once yelled the following in Wendy's parking lot, with my window down and a nice chap hopping into the car next to me: "Yes, OK! Fine! I HAD DIARRHEA!! ARE YOU SATISFIED?! I HAAAADDD DIARRHEEEAAAA!!!!" My bad. 98. I don't get sugar "highs" =( 99. I have a strange fetish for cowboy hats. 100. I once got searched 5 times in Leonardo da Vinci Airport while wearing one such hat. My carry-on had three items: my camera, my HUGE afro wig, and pottery. I'm not sure if the looks were better before they searched me or after, but I didn't pay for overweight luggage! hah!

Ok.. I don't know why some people don't like Americans, but you can all KISS MY ASS!! HAHAHAHA!! Really, I haven't the foggiest.ANYWHO...I just gave a couple calls to Kelly and Jillian to see if they wanted to go out. They both seemed like they did want to go out, but both had eaten. Far be it for me to be a glutton ALONE... so Kelly decided to meet me out. I have been craving Ruby Tuesday's fry thinga-ma-hoojits with all the cheese... mmmm, cheeeese. Afterwards, we might hit up my favorite local bar. Of course, I lost my license. Ergo, any place they are going to want to drink at probably will try and card me. I know that bar won't because I've been there so many times, they know I'm 23. Cin cin!So, anywho.. I've been thinking a lot about my friends lately, although I am not sure why. First there was this overwhelming feeling that could only be described as a Divine compulsion to find an old friend, Jean. For some reason, she showed up in one of my dreams, then another. Each time I woke up, I had this overwhelming urge to find her and find her NOW. I don't have any clue as to why this suddenly became an obsession, but I do thank God that I found her. I am very interested in seeing who she is, the type of person she has become. I had looked her up briefly a couple times, but I wasn't driven to find her like I was this time. God only knows what this is about. I know I'M clueless!! Anywho.. it sounds like she is incredibly busy. I don't want to intrude on her life being that she is so busy, but I would really like to see her. Here is where my self doubt comes in. Honestly, I find it incredibly hard to believe that I might mean something to anyone. Case in point, I still care about my old friends as well as my new- but who says that the same thing rings true for others toward me? I could reduce this to merely a poor self-esteem, but I think it is more than that. You see, I wouldn't be quick to classify myself as a person with low self confidence. Actually, I think I have quite a bit of it. Perhaps I am not thinking of myself as high as I have in the past, but when thought of again, it seems as though I might be. Last time, I was quite pleased with how I looked physically and quite frankly, felt very good about myself. If I compare myself now to myself then, there are a lot of changes. What a few years can do to a person, let alone 10!Somehow, I think I am reaching out to my past to help me make sense of my present. What is terribly confusing is that I don't find myself lacking for direction or purpose at this point in my life. I basically know what I want to do. Couple that with the fact that I don't really care about other "lost" friends and we have someone that is confused about not being confused. Maybe its just the mystery I am enjoying. Mission 1: completed- friend found. Mission 2- catch up, preferably in person, although that doesn't seem that it is likely. Who knows, maybe it is. Mission 3: figure out what place, if any, I have in her life, and vice versa. Then what? Move on, for there really is nothing else to do in one's life anyways... my mood is contemplative right now, so don't mistake this for a low mood. It just hasn't made any sense to me yet. What will really suck is that if she didn't really care to see/talk/email me. Even though she has written only once and said that she was glad to hear from me, I can't help but think that it is merely a polite formality and then when it comes down to it, she really doesn't care, no one really cares. Maybe I am facing my own "aloneness" and I don't find it appealing.

Questa settimana passada era PAZZA!!!

It's been a while since I've spoken Italian, but I am pretty sure that the above it linguistically correct for "This past week was CRAZY!!!" Monday went pretty well.... at first. Thank God Marisa was there at night, otherwise I would have a doubly hard time. You see, a client that came to our night program reported something. I pulled Marisa out of group to run it past her and she referred me to Maria, our ex-boss/current collegue. I called Maria at home and she referred me to her boss because she was not certain what to tell me. I tried calling that boss, Kiran, but I couldn't get through on her home number. I ended up leaving a message on her cell phone. Maria calls me back and tells me to call Kiran's boss (who consequently is one of my quasi-official bosses) because, afterall, Kiran is not my direct boss. THANKFULLY, our secretary was still there and I was able to get her home number. Her name is Susan. Susan and I did quite a bit of talking that night. Maria told me the next day that I should have contacted MY supervisor, Valerie. Until that point, I didn't know she WAS my boss. Although the above is confusing, that was not even the real story. The real story is what ended up happening once I got ahold of Susan and got the show on the road. It involved a lot of running around, a lot of phone calls, some nice, some not so nice, confusing laws regarding minors, and a discussion with a hot cop. I didn't do most of the talking, but trust me, he was hot. He was so nice to my client too, awwwwww! Needless to say, I will be speeding through THAT town on a regular basis. It was an EXTREMELY stressful night that took a long time to work through. I completely missed group and had to hang around for an extra two hours on top of THAT. Tuesday I had to deal with it all again and make a phone call to a certain agency and Wednesday was a pain again for a seperate reason. All if this is remarkably vague [and who said I didn't have talent?]...however it must be so due to some very strict laws. If you don't get it, don't worry yourself over it. Instead, realize that I met a really hot cop. A really, really hot cop. =)

And I barely tried! HAH!The Brainteaser Test Erin, you answered 24 out of 30 questions correctly! [Thank you, thank you, no applause necessary, really]Congratulations! Your score is in the 91st percentile. This means that if one hundred people took the test with you, your score would rank higher than 90 of them on average. [damn straight! ]When we analyzed your test, we also discovered that when it comes to quantitative ability, you measure in the 83rd percentile. [Hmm, ok] This score indicates you have unusually strong abilities when it comes to solving numerical problems. [If you say so!] If there is a numerical pattern to be found, you'll find it. [Ok, I'm good with patterns ] You've got a knack for noticing when something "isn't right." [True, true] Whether you're conscious of it or not, you have an ability to simply understand when something doesn't add up. [I'm conscious of it- for example, right now I don't feel as though THIS adds up, but don't mind me, please keep going] Also, when it comes to splitting the check, doing taxes, or determining the number of fans in a baseball stadium, you're the one people turn to. [HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHAHAHAAAAA!! It's easier for me to treat than divide the damn check! Oh man, hah, that was a good laugh....]

I'm bored. Really bored. Really, really bored. So..

... I took a personality test. Erin, your career personality type is INFP That means that based on the standard measure of personality traits, you are highly organized and have strong project management skills. You prefer to work independently and then pass your ideas or tasks on to others. When others lose sight of the big picture, you help them to stay focused to see what's important and weed out unnecessary details. This skill set will help you succeed in nearly any workplace.The reason employers and recruiters might be on the lookout for you is that only about 3-4% of the U.S. population shares the unique characteristics of your personality type. Research shows that businesses succeed when employers create a good balance of personality types in the office. And since only 3-4% of the U.S. population shares your type, that means employers are looking for you.<--------- HAAAAAAAAHAHHAHAAH!

I know I am no good at mathSure, sure, back in my day, I used to like it. Then division came along. I've never liked division, but once we were allowed to use a calculator, I no longer abhored it as much. I loved algebra and geometry.... until we got to trigonometry, calculus, and statistics. Blah! What's my point? Well, I've taken enough math and did well in it to know this:it's not normal for a person to have a correct guessing rate of 50%.Yet I do.For as long as I can remember I have been very good at guessing. I can't figure out the probability- but I got 5 questions of 10 correct on an "identify the hidden picture" ESP quiz. Each picture had 5 choices... so out of 50 choices in 10 questions, I got the answer correct 5 times. Does that seem strange to you?Color me bonkers, but this stuff happens all the times- I have WAY too many coincidences in my life. I have to have some sort of strange powers.For instance, I can look at a person and tell if they want to harm me. Because I may have this "power", I've never actually become a victim, so to speak. I've had a couple close run ins with guns/car jackings, possible muggings/rape attempts, and the like, but have always gotten this overwhelming feeling to act- usually to get the hell out of wherever I am at the time. Yes, this may sound odd. Who knows, maybe it could even be chalked up to a female intuition... but it goes further than that too. You see, I will think of something I haven't thought of in eons- let us, for clarity's sake, say it was about Alvin and the Chipmunks. Well, usually immediately after I think of it, I will come into contact with the same subject, on a billboard, the radio, whatever. This sort of thing happens to me constantly. Think of an old friend and they email you the next day? Happens all the time to me.. all the time. I am talking several times a week here. And of course, I have my statistically significant correct guess rate... Intuition? Psychic powers? Enough to get me a highly lucrative hotline? You be the judge. Like I said, I stink at math.

Pimpli{a ----> e}{o ----> i }Florescent lights apparently cause some people to break out in pimples. I think I am one of those people. GRRR! I never really got acne in my teens, maybe I am making up for it now, slowly. It's annoying!This week was pretty good and fairly productive. I think I am going to go in for a bit this weekend to catch up on my client records/charts. I figure that I can't get into the front office to photocopy things and I wouldn't bother calling anyone on the weekends, so perhaps I could focus to write those stinkin' progress notes, 5th notes, and tx plans that I need. Hey, it sounds good at least, doesn't it?I'm getting bored with life these days. I was looking online and suddenly the thought occurred to me- write a children's book. Out of left field? Yes. Difficult to get published? You betcha! But hey, if I'm not pursuing my graduate education, I might as well get a book published, right?! I really think I will give this one a go. I've always loved writing and kids and I've got enough time to work on something like that these days (or at least on these weekends). It can't hurt. If all else fails, I will save them and consider working on them in the future- or I will land a deal. I figure a book or two and I should be much closer to the world of the debt-free. Now for a topic..... hmmmmm....

What a day..This day went by soooo fast. I guess that's a good thing, but geez. I went into work 1/2 hour early.. YES, EARLY!! I know it's hard to believe. At 1pm I had an intake. I was out of that intake at about 5 pm. It didn't start until 1:30, but that is still quite long for an eval./intake. I can't say too much because of extremely strict federal laws, but damn, I have to give serious props to this client. It won't be hard to help because the situation is so desperate- a few nice words will probably do more than any tx (treatment) plan would. I just hope things work out better in the future for this person than they have in the past.So, yeah, Im home now, obviously. I called Jillian to see if she wanted to go out, but so far no response. She is probably working. Ah well, there is always tomorrow.